In my late twenties there was a trend that 'blonds were dumb and stupid'. Furthermore, if you were a "Tasmanian" (born in the state of Tasmania, Australia) you had two heads, were inbred and quite 'backward', mentally!! So where did that leave me? .... I was living and working in the state of Queensland, Australia where these beliefs were filtering through, I was blond, and came from Tasmania! At the time, this external disapproval did not bother me so much. Yet, I noticed some years later, that a friend of mine was quite upset by the "two headed Tasmanian" reference, as she was also a "Tasmanian".
My response to the comment "two headed Tasmanian" used to be "Yes, it's great because I have two heads, so I have two brains, so I am twice as intelligent!" Furthermore, it just so happened that later in life I had a skin cancer removed (42 stitches) from my shoulder which left me with a scar. So I used this as proof that one of my 'heads/brains' had been removed and I was quite disappointed, as now I was just functioning from one brain only! I offered to go with my friend and speak with the person who degraded her, and show them my scar and explain about the benefits of "being a two headed Tasmanian", at that time! Yet, we decided we were enough, regardless.
Fortunately in those two instances I did not 'buy into' those particular external beliefs, and even had some fun with it! Yet, there were times in my life when 'external disapproval' really got to me, and Im thinking this could be the case for you as well. So what is the solution to this? Of course, no one deserves to be degraded, and I would advocate, standing up for how you are feeling for having what is supportive for you, and those around you. Furthermore, it can be very supportive to release the unwanted feelings that come up around disapproval within you, and allow them to dissolve. Thereby giving yourself the feeling of approval and more! This way, you can truly 'be' standing on your own 'two feet', because in some situations, there could be a time when you cannot find someone to support you.
Now the quote in the above image, is pointing to this. It is referring to an unlimited nature that is always within. It is pointing to, inviting you, to take back your 'peaceful power' simply because it feels so much easier and supportive from which to be functioning from. Another exploration is to decide to, (if you are open to it) " let go of ...... allowing yourself to be controlled by that person/place/thing". The best way I know how to do that is through 'freeing up' these unwanted feelings (and more) when they arise, through a simple method that was developed by Lester Levenson. It is the 'how-to' of letting go/releasing emotions and more! I was fortunate enough to learn this method through a mentor named Hale Dwoskin. Who states "don't believe a word I say". I found this supportive, as I could check from within myself, no matter what everyone else was saying, to see what was true for me. This is an unwavering truth, in my experience. I also found it very beneficial to have Hale and his team of Instructors open to the discovery that 'you' are doing the releasing, not them. So, there isn't a sense of 'idol-ism'. The Sedona Method Team, often guide you to notice that there is nothing 'special' about them, or what they do, and Facilitators and Coaches of this Method are invited to open to this as well.
If you haven't already noticed, it is this Method that I am choosing to Coach, with because of its profound effectiveness - to name just one advantage. It is called The Sedona Method. More info here You are also most welcome to read all the free info I have presented on this website from my experience/s and gains of applying The Sedona Method and the teachings of Lester Levenson in my own life. I am forever grateful for it all, and also for another mentor, Jack Canfield, who first introduced Hale, and the Sedona Method, at his Breakthrough To Success seminar in USA.
**Often unwanted feelings , thoughts and beliefs about a particular situation, person, place or thing can be a 'hold back'. It does not allow us to take a priority step for moving forward in a positive direction. Feelings of 'doubt' can come up.
**In this free 11 min free audio and Introductory PDF you can be gently guided to release and 'let go' of any of those unwanted 'doubt' feelings that arise in any moment. You can experience how to 'open' and notice, those feelings of 'inner certainty', inner strength, courage and come from a sense of being 'at peace' for moving forward. Simply opt in below and instantly receive the audio and pdf. No obligations. Your information is kept private & confidential.
So here is a quick example. In this moment, can you allow yourself to notice any situation that brings up the feeling of self doubt? And can you allow yourself just to notice that feeling of 'doubt', could you let that feeling be here? And just for now, can you allow yourself to look through that 'doubt' feeling ...... and notice what's beyond ....... ? These questions are just one round of questions that are greatly extended with this coaching. There are at least 2 further questions that go with these. Yet, you may have noticed that it is now a little 'freer' around the feeling already? If you would like to experience more of these simple releases feel free to opt in on any of the pages on this website for the freebie of your choice. Wishing you much inner freedom, especially beyond any doubt, worry or fear feelings 💕
1. Mindset: I can, I will (anon.)
2. Inhale confidence, exhale doubt! (anon.)
3. Confidence is not "they will like me". Confidence is "I'll be fine if they don't!"
4. It's not what you are that is holding you back. It's what you think you are not! (anon.)
5. You can admire someone else's beauty without questioning your own.
6. It's a good day to have a good day! (FoodMatters)
7. I nourish my mind, body and soul with my thoughts.
8. You can be a good person with a kind heart and still say no. (tinybuddha.com)
9. A flower does not think to compete with the flower next to it. It just blooms. (anon.)
10. Be yourself. No one can say you're doing it wrong! (Charles M Schulz)
Also check yoganess.net for more info.
1. Can you read the statement out load, or to yourself : "I am super confident".
How does that feel ? Does it bring up any feeling of resistance? Any feelings of "No I am not" or "I'm not"?? Usually, this is definitely what happens. A quick tip is to simply decide that you no longer want to 'hold onto' that feeling and allow yourself to set it free. Here are 3 quick questions from The Sedona Method technique that can help release that feeling of resistance when it comes up. Just notice that feeling of resistance as best you can ..... and allow it to be here. Then ask yourself, Could I let that resistance feeling go? Would I let it go, if I could let it go? (from Coach Susan Seifert). and "When?". The "Now" or "present time" is the only time it can be 'let go', so just a simple "now" is a great answer to that 3rd question. Any other time just 'yes' or 'no' answers are fine, you don't have to converse with it.
Just to review those releasing questions: Could I let the feeling of resistance go? (yes/no) .
Would I let the feeling of resistance go..... if I could let it go?
And when? Repeat the round of 3 questions as much as you want, until you feel the resistance feeling has dissolved, and welcome any and all sense of "peace".
Please note: that myself or The Sedona Method technique, do not treat, diagnose, cure or advise on any medical or psychological condition. Please seek the appropriate service for that, if needed.
2. When in doubt, check it out. Sometimes the mind can play tricks, or not, and assumptions can be made. Its usually a good idea to go ahead and ask for feedback , further information and clarity with regard to any doubt feelings around an issue or situation. If possible 'check/ask" from a sense of 'peace', as it is usually more open and free, no matter what the feedback is. Yet, be true to your feelings and do not force 'asking' if it feels uncomfortable, allow yourself to be your own judge. The aim is meant to put the mind at ease in terms of real clarity, rather than 'dig up more resistance' !!! Be your own best judge, and trust your instinct.
3. Ensure you are well organised and know your topic. Drop any sense of 'time scarcity" as it too, brings up the feeling of 'lack' ... something that you are not in control of, and/or are being controlled by (for example). Sometimes, it can be a quick re organising and decluttering that resolves these issues. Can you re organise one step at a time? It may only take one simple adjustment (add or delete) and it will allow for greater "ease and flow".
I hope you enjoyed this post and feel free to leave a positive comment below if you wish.
Also "opt in" on the "Free Gifts" web page here, for some free guided audio mp3 files on releasing unwanted feelings.
Kate Burke is a Certified Professional Coach & Sedona Method Facilitator, with a Ba.Ed. in Health and Phys. Ed. She is the author of 4 ebooks on amazon, and one of her specialties is Confidence Coach for Women.